Can we use our mistakes for our own good?

We always see mistakes as a deficiency, as a flaw, as a source of shame, as something that shouldn't be.

In this section, we'll look at this from a different angle, we'll look at how we can use our mistakes to improve ourselves, and we'll give a little nod to learning from mistakes, which I'm familiar with from the software universe.

To do this, we can go back to a time when we made a mistake, but that mistake carried us forward, back to our childhood.

When we put our hand to the stove as a child, the heat would come, our parents would say, baby, don't touch that stove, your hand will burn. Of course, we don't listen, we put our hand close to the stove until it really burns. Eventually our hand gets burnt and we learn that we should not touch it again, otherwise our hand will get burnt. 

Almost the whole childhood passes with stories like this, we try to walk, we fall, we learn what we do to fall and we start not to fall.

Then when we get a little older, when our ego starts to form, we start to see not making mistakes as a virtue. 

After all, we are no longer children, we have a mind, and not making mistakes shows how decent a person we are.

This pushes us to avoid mistakes, to ignore them, to hide them from the outside world if we can't do anything about them.

This running away from mistakes forces us to ignore them, blame them on the outside world and stay away from development in situations we cannot avoid.

At this point, as we run away from mistakes in order to protect ourselves, we are actually throwing away our development opportunities. 

But mistakes are not traps that stop us; they are signs that, when approached with the right perspective, illuminate our path. 

When we choose to approach them, listen to them and understand what they are saying, instead of avoiding them, mistakes become guides that move us forward. This is exactly what we will talk about in this article: 

How can we transform our relationship with our mistakes and use them for our own good?

Philosophical and Scientific Background

Philosophical Perspective

When dealing with mistakes, we need to see them not only as defects or shortcomings, but also as experiences that can guide us. 

To this end, we will first look at how mistakes have been philosophically conceived and examine how intellectual perspectives throughout human history have interpreted mistakes. This approach will provide a basic framework for both our personal development and our learning processes.

Reading Error as a Moral Problem

Plato argues that error arises from the ignorance of the mind that cannot see the truth. (1*) To fall into error is to be far from wisdom.

For St. Augustine, error is man's deviation from the divine good; it is a moral deficiency and an existential shadow. (2*)

This perspective situates error as a shortcoming directed against oneself, not merely a wrong done.

To Attach More to the Result than to the Process

Francis Bacon, arguing that knowledge develops through experience and observation, points to the importance of process. (3*) But too often we tend to glorify the result. Our eyes are locked only on the poles of "right or wrong?" 

This approach obscures what happens in between, the layered and rich process of learning. Without even realizing it, we miss the most valuable lesson we can learn from mistakes when we simply label them as "unintended consequences".

The Difference Between Knowing and Learning

Modern thinker John Dewey did not limit learning to the mere possession of knowledge; for him, true learning is an active process, shaped by experience and built over time. (4*) 

While "I knew" refers to a static state, "I learned" refers to a dynamic journey of repetition, experimentation and questioning.

One of the most important catalysts of this journey is mistakes. Mistakes are not just missteps; they are signs that trigger learning and deepen experience. Trying to move forward without mistakes leaves us on the surface and closes the door to real learning. 

On the other hand, when we choose to look carefully at our mistakes, they both reinforce what we have learned and open the door to new realizations.

Scientific Perspective

To see mistakes only as personal failings is to miss the scientific and learning-based dimension they offer. 

In fact, the developmentand adaptation of any system, whether biological or artificial, is made possible by the feedback it receives from its environment. 

Recognizing our mistakes, extracting information from themand transforming this information into new behaviors is one of the most fundamental learning mechanisms of life.

No Adaptation Without Feedback

In order for a system to evolve, it must first listen to its environment. Living things adapt based on the feedback they receive from their environment, just as artificial intelligence systems improve their performance based on the feedback they receive. 

If we don't receive feedback or ignore it, we repeat the same mistakes and miss the opportunity to learn. (5*)

Not Learning from Unrecorded Experiences

Gaining experience does not mean learning in itself. We experience many things in our daily lives, but unless we stop to think about them, record them and interpret them, they remain "raw data". 

Writing down our mistakes, reflecting on them and making sense of them helps us break out of the cycle. Otherwise, we reproduce the same mistakes on different days, under different circumstances.

Small Deviations Leading to Big Learnings

Learning is not always born from big and dramatic mistakes. Often, it is the small deviations that are hard to recognize that lead to the most profound realizations. 

A tiny mistake missed during an experiment can lead to a whole new perspective in the next step. In personal development, as in scientific processes, it is not the mistake itself, but how we look at it. (6*)

Social and Cultural Perspective

In modern societies, our approach to mistakes is shaped by performance expectations, educational attitudes and social approval mechanisms.

The Place of Error in Performance Culture

In the modern world, speed, efficiency and success are no longer just a choice, but a necessity. Society expects us to constantly achieve more, to be faster, to produce more efficient results. One of the unseen side effects of this performance-oriented culture is the way we approach mistakes.

In such an environment, mistakes are often perceived as a flaw to be hidden, even a source of shame. 

As people strive to project a strong and flawless image in their careers or social circles, the reflex to hide their mistakes becomes stronger. This leads to opportunities for learning slipping away silently.

Rather than hiding our mistakes, making them visible can be a critical step for both personal and societal development. (7*)

When we admit when we make mistakes, we not only contribute to our own development journey, but also lead to a healthier and more transparentlearning culture in our environment.

The Obsession with the "Right Answer" in Education and Work

Modern education and work life, is often shaped by an approach that prioritizes finding the "right answer". Underlying this approach is the assumption that making mistakes is negative, even punishable. However, this severely limits both the learning process and individual creativity.

The Relationship between Social Approval and Error

Nowadays, visibility has become central to life with the impact of social media and being online all the time. In this age of visibility, making mistakes is perceived not only as a personal disappointment but also as a public risk. 

Thus, many people choose to hide, ignore or pass the buck. (8*)

Real Problem and Solution Suggestions

Real Problem

The fact that we make mistakes is not a real obstacle to development. The real problem is that these mistakes, once recognized, pass by without being reflected upon, analyzed and turned into a learning process.

This prevents the system, whether personal or organizational, from updating itself and moving forward. Mistakes only create repetitive cycles unless they are addressed.

The real problem is not the existence of the mistake, but its ignorance, and with it the failure to address it. (9*) Errors lose their potential instructive power when they are not reflected upon and made sense of. (10*)

Solution: The Learning System Approach

Real transformation begins when we choose to read our mistakes as learning signals, rather than seeing them as personal flaws. 

The learning systems approach focuses on analyzing mistakes and improving in small steps, rather than suppressing or labeling them.

Read instead of labeling mistakes

Stigmatizing a mistake as "wrong" or a "failure" shuts it down. Instead, it is important to ask the question "What is this telling me?"

Handling-repeating-errors-as-patterns

If the same kind of errors recur, this indicates a pattern. These patterns make visible our habits or flaws in our system.

Making small adjustments rather than big decisions

The learning systems approach advocates evolutionary steps rather than revolutionary decisions. Small but continuous adjustments make progress possible.

Conclusion and Message to the Reader

Mistakes alone are not instructive. It is our relationship with them that teaches. When we choose to look carefully at our mistakes, make sense of them and learn from them, they become one of the most powerful tools for personal growth.

Now to your question...

Have you made a mistake recently that you realized but didn't think about? What could this mistake have taught you if you had taken a moment to examine it?

With this article, I conclude my series on "Software Philosophy" with the topics of internal technical debts, small iterations, systems thinking and learning from mistakes.

This journey, which takes the human being as a system, has clearly shown me that learning is not just about having the right tools, but how we look at them.

Perhaps the biggest obstacle to learning is not the mistakes we make, but the moments when we avoid looking at them.

What we ignore, suppress, or put aside as "unimportant" is where learning is silently sabotaged.

In the next article, I will continue from this very point.

We will try to look together at the moments we recognize but don't want to face, what we don't want to see, why we don't see it and how this invisible resistance hinders our learning process.

Until then, stay in love, learning from your mistakes.

Source

1. Plato, Theaetetus.
2. Augustinus, Confessiones.
3. Francis Bacon, Novum Organum.
4. John Dewey, Experience and Education.
5. Carol Dweck, Mindset: The New Psychology of Success
6. James Reason, Human Error
7. Amy Edmondson, The Fearless Organization
8. Albert Bandura, Social Learning Theory 
9. Daniel Kahneman, Thinking, Fast and Slow 
10. Sidney Dekker, The Field Guide to Understanding Human Error